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Limitations as Strengths May 18, 2015

When people go about thinking and labeling their limitations they often begin by considering them from a place of self-judgment with negative feelings attached to them. What if I told you that our limitations can actually be our new strengths? Sounds crazy but when one identifies and accepts their limitations it can allow a shift to occur. You see with acceptance comes empowerment to do something differently. What once may have felt difficult suddenly becomes a window of opportunity. Learning…

How to apply the safety to your Emotional Triggers March 19, 2015

Centering Awareness on the mind and body Grounding through Relaxation or Mindfulness Flip the switch to more Helpful Self-Talk Reconciling the trigger with Communication   Who doesn’t have emotional triggers? I know I get bent out of shape when someone on the freeway doesn’t let me in and when someone is driving too slow and when I feel disrespected or undervalued. Awareness of our emotional triggers can be helpful in order to gain an increased internal locus of control and…

Misguided Self-Love March 5, 2015

What is self-love really? Let’s start by highlighting what it is not. Self-love is not egotistical nor narcissistic. It is not selfish or uncaring. Self-love is quite the opposite. Self-love is knowing our strengths, our limitations, our triggers, and how best to cope and care for ourselves among life’s challenges. Self-love is accepting ourselves and respectfully behaving or communicating in such a way as to honor our personal needs. All too common, and in a variety of ways, we tend…

Communication User Error November 6, 2014

Communication is a team effort but not all people are considered equal in skill level or style. There has to be a communicator and a listener and they hopefully reciprocate respectfully with each other. Unfortunately, most of us were not taught how to be excellent communicators. Instead we fall back on what we know through our own experiences of getting our needs met which was influenced by how we grew up. We learned many communication patterns from our parents or caregivers by unconscious…

Understanding Therapy and Counseling: The Content and The Process October 15, 2014

Therapy and counseling do not have to be a drudging through every detail of one’s past experiences. In fact, if a client, or couple, are motivated and willing to explore their painful patterns and accept their behaviors contributing to problems, the work can be faster than one thinks. The beauty of therapy and counseling is that we are always offered opportunity to work through our past, in our present, which can feel like a series of aha moments allowing for…

Moving From Black and White Thinking to Shades of Gray October 6, 2014

There are many limits to thinking only in black and white terms. It can impact one’s mood, can limit personal choices and opportunities, damage relationships, and ultimately create suffering for the user and others around them. Black and white thinking limits one’s ability to have “win, win” experiences or exchanges. It also limits opportunities for learning from mistakes. In the mind of the black and white thinker there must be a definitive winner and loser in most situations. When one sees…

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